IMG_20160130_162926 [395065]

 

This is a transcript of my three year old daughter Olive’s “rest time” that we attempt every afternoon. Arthur is my 7 year old Irish Terrier, who must have thought I went temporarily deaf.

3:58 pm

Olive:

I get to sleep….I get to sleep.

It’s daytime…it’s daytime. Say, Hello! and I open the door to say, Hi!

 (Door opens, then shuts again)

Hmm lallaaa laaa lalalala dum dee da da

(Door opens, short pause, then shuts again)

Hmmmamaa maammmaaa hmmmm laa laa laa

Hi-ho the dairy-o, the farmer and the dell….looopy loopy doo doo da

(Door opens, short pause, then shuts loud. Arthur comes to warn me that Olive is opening her door.)

Lullaby…go to sleep… *LOUD, DRAMATIC SIGH* hmmm hmmm hmm hmm

Time to go to the bank. I need cake! Hee hee hee hee hee

Wah. Wah. Wah. Wah. Wah. Wah. Wah. (sung to the tune of “I’m A Little Teapot” )

(Door opens, shuts very quickly. Twice. Arthur comes to warn me again.)

*Lots of sounds of rustling around and random humming.*

(Door opens. Arthur must have greeted her at the door because I hear small whispers, then door shuts. Arthur comes into office, yawns, and walks off.)

Right now…we can get some more…Oh, Arthur, at the door…(sung to the tune “This Old Man”)

Mommy mommy mommmy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy

(I now go in to tell her she has some rest time left and I will get her when it’s over. Her response: “But I don’t wanna rest anymore!!”)

*Lots of clapping and humming, then long silence.*

Oh ah oh ah oh ah wahooo *whistle whistle* Clean up. Did you know you made the mess? You know why? Because. Then, we need to get a clean…a pair of…what you want to do? What. Do. You. Want. To. Do. I have to get a new pair of socks. Did you know why? The end. So….I’m wearing a crown. Yeah. You know why? It’s so beautiful outside! The sun is up…and…well it’s beautiful. I’m still gonna wear my crown and all. Jumping in the mud. Oooh ooh oh boy. It’s very much cold. Very much it’s cold. I’m gonna put my hands in my pocket.

Mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mama mama mama mama mummy mummy mummy mummy (Not getting a response, so she stops.)

She tripped in the rock n roll. Then she went back. Hey, don’t go forward and back!

Mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy

(Arthur comes to get me, jumping on me over and over to get my attention.)

Mommy mommy MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY

4:28 pm

Two more minutes. Wait. Two. More. Minutes.

Mema momma mamma mommy mamama mummy

4:30 pm

And “rest time” is over.